Woman's Friends Are Mad at Her for Leaving Girls' Night Early After Her Friend Invited a Guy

A woman says she ducked out of a girls' night with two of her longtime friends because she felt uncomfortable — and her friends are accusing her of being “dramatic.”

The woman shared her experience on the Reddit forum “Am I the A------?,” on Feb. 16, explaining that she and her friends, Jenna and Shay, meet up for dinner and drinks “once or twice a month.”

She writes that during their most recent night out, they went to dinner and ended up at a bar, where she says they “got a great high-top table near the bar and DJ.”

She says everyone was enjoying themselves until Jenna announced she had invited her crush to join. The OP (original poster) says Jenna also asked the owner if they could swap tables and move to the more spacious lounge area — without consulting the others.

“The problem? Shay and I loved our table and didn’t want to move,” the OP wrote, adding that they informed Jenna of this fact, “but she insisted because she wanted to snuggle next to her crush.” 

The woman goes on to say that Jenna and her crush took the only couch in the new seating area, and Shay got a barstool — leaving the OP to sit on an “awkward” bench without a back. What’s more, she says that the new seating arrangement made her feel self-conscious about her body.

“Our theme for the night was tight skinny jeans and as a mid-sized girl (size 14) with a pooch, I already felt self-conscious. My friends (Jenna size 4, Shay size 6) don’t always understand what it’s like being bigger,” she explained.

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She says that Shay — who had also initially not wanted to move seats — “suddenly turned on me” accusing her of ruining the night and voicing her frustration with her “low” self-esteem.”

“By then, the bar was packed, and no other tables were available. I told them they could stay, but I was leaving. Later, they bombarded me with messages, calling me the a------ for leaving over a seat. They claimed they’d have sucked it up if roles were reversed. I told them I wouldn’t have put them in that situation in the first place,” the OP continued.

“Girls’ night is meant to be fun for everyone. If they were uncomfortable, I’d have adjusted things to accommodate them,” the woman concluded before asking, “So, am I the a------?”

Reddit users were quick to come to the OP’s defense, with many noting that excusing yourself from an uncomfortable situation in no way makes you an “a------.”

“One of the best things about being a grown up is not letting yourself stay in situations where you know you'll be made to feel bad about yourself. You ruined nothing. You saved your night by leaving an uncomfortable situation,” wrote one person.

“NTA [not the a------]. Why did she invite the dude to girls' night anyway? Tacky. Also, they were not acting like friends,” wrote another.

“As someone who is plus size, I fully get leaving a place over a seat. However, there is an even bigger issue here. The point of girls night is not to ‘snuggle with our crush.’ It's to hang out with the girls. Can she not hang out with her crush any other day?? That's not a real girl friend. NTA and I would consider getting better friends,” added someone else.