Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott 'Were Definitely Trying' Before 'Out of the Blue' Split Announcement: Sources

Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott’s now-deleted split announcement came as a surprise even to friends who'd been aware of their previous struggles as a couple. 

Sources tell PEOPLE Spelling, 50, and McDermott, 56, seemed to be in a better place than they had been in a while when he posted on Instagram that they were separating.

“Their friends have seen their ups and downs through the years, but they really did seem to be in a good place in recent months,” says one source close to the Beverly Hills 90210 alum. “This feels really out of the blue."

The source continues, "If this had happened a year ago, it would’ve been expected because things were terrible between them. Sure, they still had their disagreements and didn’t always see eye to eye, but the past six months things had felt good between them.”

A source close to the family explains also thought some of the couple's prior turbulence was behind them.

“They were definitely trying in the last few months though, and things felt way less toxic,” says the second insider. “They also made an effort to make holidays and milestones special, and were much more in tune with each other. It’s been a night-and-day difference from the last couple years.”

On June 17,  McDermott announced their decision to part ways via Instagram. "It’s with great sadness and a very very heavy heart that after 18 years together and 5 amazing children, that @torispelling and I have decided to go our separate ways, and start a new journey of our own," he wrote alongside a photograph of himself and Spelling with their kids.

The message, which also touched on their future as co-parents, was deleted shortly after McDermott posted it.

Reps for both Spelling and McDermott have not responded to PEOPLE's request for comment. The actress has not publicly commented on the seeming split, and it’s unclear whether the post was a mistake. 

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Spelling and McDermott tied the knot in 2006 and share five children: Liam Aaron McDermott, 16, Stella Doreen, 15, Hattie Margaret, 11, Finn Davey, 10 and Beau Dean, 6.

The pair have long been open about their relationship struggles, including a cheating scandal, that played out on their reality show True Tori. Spelling previously told PEOPLE the infidelity caused a shift in their marriage. “We had to start over. We had to completely rebuild."