Savannah Chrisley Clings to 'Signs' from Nic Kerdiles as She Comes to Terms with His Death: 'This Isn't Fair'

Savannah Chrisley continues to mourn her ex Nic Kerdiles after his sudden death over the weekend. 

In an emotional Instagram post on Sunday, the Chrisley Knows Best star shared the depth of her emotions as she processes her grief. “It is impossible to believe that you are really gone,” she wrote in the caption. “I am not sure how to even absorb that news, I don’t know how to react. I am so sad and so numb. I don’t want to believe it… I keep texting your phone and just hope you respond.”

Chrisley continued, “We had some really great, bright moments, and we had some really hard ones, but the part of our relationship I will hold on to will always be the moments in the middle. It will be the day to day life we got to share for 5 incredible years.. It will be your absolute and total dependency on Starbucks and how no day could start without it. It will be your love for moms carrot cake, I feel certain no person has ever loved carrot cake like you. It will be your inability to ever get a famous cliche saying right, LOL, you would butcher every quote, every time.” 

Chrisley, 26, noted the pair “learned how to love together” before adding an additional comment on the post. In it, she said Kerdiles accompanied her to bring her father, Todd Chrisley, to his Pensacola prison earlier this year. “It was YOU who was there for me and drove me through a very dark day,” she wrote. 

She ended the caption, “I am thankful and I will treasure every moment, every memory, every photo and every good day we shared together. Oh gosh… what I wouldn’t do to hear an, ‘I LOVE YOU KID’ right about now. Gosh! I miss you… this isn’t fair!”

Though there is heavy grief associated with Kerdiles’ death, Chrisley is already starting to see “signs” of his presence. In an Instagram Story, Chrisley shared texts from a friend that included a ham and cheese croissant — a food Kerdiles loved. 

The friend said it was a happy coincidence their mother made this type of croissant when Savannah previously mentioned she’d look for Nic in similar moments. “Wouldn’t expect anything less from our overachiever Nicholas,” Chrisley wrote. “Already giving signs that he’s enjoying a hot crepe in heaven.” 

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Kerdiles, a 29-year-old former NHL player, died last week in a motorcycle accident. He'd previously been engaged to Chrisley after they began dating in November 2017. The pair postponed their wedding in early 2020 and remained cordial after they ended their engagement officially in September 2020.