Kailyn Lowry Reunites with Ex Javi Marroquin to Explain Change in Custody for Son Lincoln, 11: 'There's No Winning'

Kailyn Lowry's life is undergoing another significant shift.

In the latest episode of her podcast Barely Famous, the mom of seven, 33, is joined by ex-husband Javi Marroquin to discuss a change in their co-parenting dynamic. The two share son Lincoln, 11, and have shared 50-50 custody of him since their divorce in 2016.

That custody arrangement is now changing, with the two revealing Javi will be stationed in Virginia and will be moving this summer. The father of three — who also shares daughter Maizee Joelle, 9 months, and son Eli, 6, with fiancée Lauren Comeau — explained he's done everything he can to stay in Delaware as long as he can.

"My first six years were active duty and then I got out because I didn't want to move. In that time, I opened up the gym and went into the Reserves side of the house," Javi shared of his Air Force career.

"A guy who came to my gym, he offered me a job back in active duty and he was like, 'I can put you so that you can stay here in Delaware.' I was like, 'Okay, can't pass that up.' And then since then, from year six to now, I've exhausted all my positions in Delaware that I can take and stay here."

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When Javi presented the news to Kailyn to figure out custody of Lincoln, the two struggled to come to the same vision, with each wanting to keep their son with them.

"I just thought that my connection with Lincoln was a little more crucial at the age he's at to be with me, I don't want to say more important, more crucial to be with me now and in the next three years than to stay," Javi explained of his side.

"We started having this conversation when he was 10, and my thought process was, 'Okay this will be an entirely different conversation at 10 and 13.' So my thought was, 'Okay if he goes and he gets stationed somewhere, Lincoln stays with me, and at 13 we would basically reevaluate the situation. And if he goes and says, 'I want to live with my dad,' I think it would be a different conversation," Kailyn said.

The two explained that Javi told Lincoln about the situation, to Kailyn's disappointment because she wanted to tell him together. He explained that in doing so, he was gauging what his son wanted so he could move forward accordingly. It wasn't that easy, however, with Lincoln tearful in both homes and expressing a desire to stay with each of his parents as they faced a school year/summer custody split.

Javi continued to address the situation on Instagram. He released a statement acknowledging what he shared on the podcast. He wrote, "I was able to hide these emotions because no one knew and it almost didn't feel real. I knew it wasn't something we could hide forever so I thought going on the pod was the best way for both parties to communicate and explain why we came to the decisions we did."

"I had a lot more to say, but I can't get my thoughts and words to line up right now. Tears roll down my face knowing how real it feels now. There's no winning. I don't win. Kail doesn't win, Lincoln doesn't win," he continued.

"One thing I know for sure... Lincoln will never have to question who I am as a dad and the only thing between us now are the miles we have to drive to see each other. Everything's going to be ok."

In an Instagram Q&A, he explained, "She will get the school year. I get every 3 day weekend, every holiday, and summer... and next year we will come together and let Lincoln decide."

When asked if he was okay, he explained, "I am at peace because 1) I am ok with the custody we decided on and 2) I have no doubt about who I am as a dad and I know me and Lauren will both work together to not miss a beat."

He was asked about how much time he loses and explained it remains "pretty close," with him going from 182 days a year to 150.

Kailyn and Javi first moved to Delaware during their marriage. She has continued to live in the area as she raises Lincoln and his siblings — Verse and Valley, 16 months, and 2-year-old son Rio, whom she shares with fiancé Elijah Scott; Creed, 4½, and Lux, 7½, whom she shares with ex Chris Lopez; and 14-year-old son Isaac, whom she shares with ex Jo Rivera.

The two also noted the "ripple effect" of that decision, which resulted in Jo and wife Vee Rivera moving to Delaware and members of their respective families following.

"I think us coming to Delaware has spiderwebbed into something so much bigger that none of us can control,” Kailyn admitted. "I don’t make my day-to-day decisions off of you and Lauren, and I don’t make my day-to-day decisions off of Jo and Vee and vice versa. Like, I don’t. I can’t expect you guys to make your decisions off of us. But I think that there is something to be said about what we have created, and that is the spiderweb." 

She continued, "So if you pull on the spiderweb on one side, that entire spiderweb is having a ripple effect. Because Jo moved here, his mom moved here, Vee moved here for Jo, Vee’s sister just moved here. So there [are] so many layers to this, and I think it’s nobody’s fault.” 

The two also looked back at their parenting dynamic over the years, noting they enjoyed time together in Spain in November and made progress in their complicated co-parenting dynamic. While that progress was temporarily foiled by a podcast comment, Kailyn apologized to Javi and Lauren and they're all committed to being a "united front" for what's next.